According to Hands (1996), codependency is a complex set of behaviours, beliefs and attitudes involving:
- Care-taking
- Shame and low self-worth
- Controlling
- Obsession
- Repression and denial
- Lack of trust
- Anger
- Weak boundaries
- Neglect of self
Typical manifestations of codependence are considered to be:
- Difficulty in identifying personal feelings
- Difficulty in acknowledging and expressing feelings
- Difficulty in forming or maintaining close relationships
- Being rigid or stuck in attitudes or behaviour
- Being a perfectionist
- Difficulty in adjusting to change
- Feeling overly responsible for the behaviour or feelings of other people
- Attempting to control the behaviours of others.
(Meacham 1989; Whitfield 1989; cited in Hands 1996)